Oh Fudge!

Here is my Valentine entry. I want to apologize for the near-vulgarities expressed in this blog and title. I am so disappointed. I decided to make fudge for Valentine's Day. We've made this recipe many times and it is the best, smoothest fudge ever. Since we discovered this recipe, we now eschew fudge from the Rocky Mountain Chocolate Company because it is gummy. Quick fudge recipes tend to be dry and overly sweet. So my plan was to make the fudge, cut out a few heart shapes with cookies cutters for teachers and visiting teachees, and have the rest for our family. Good plan? My first mistake was that I was in a hurry. The next mistake was that I grabbed the "Pound Plus" chocolate bar at Trader Joes with Almonds instead of plain bittersweet. Fatal mistake? I don't know. Here's the recipe. It's from Sunset Magazine and if you follow the tips and are patient, it should turn out great!

Creamy Chocolate Fudge
Sunset Magazine
Notes: You will need a candy thermometer to make this fudge. Be sure to read "Candy Basics" and "Fudge Pointers" below before beginning.
4 cups sugar
1 1/2 cups whipping cream
1/4 cup light corn syrup
6 ounces unsweetened chocolate, finely chopped
6 ounces bittersweet or semisweet chocolate, finely chopped
1/4 cup (1/8 lb.) butter, cut into chunks
2 teaspoons vanilla
1. In a 3- to 4-quart heavy-bottomed pan over medium-low heat, stir sugar, cream, and corn syrup, continually scraping the bottom of the pan with a heatproof flexible spatula, until sugar is completely dissolved, about 15 minutes. Stir in unsweetened and bittersweet chocolate until melted. Increase heat to medium and bring mixture to a simmer.
2. Cook, occasionally stirring mixture and brushing down sides of pan with a wet pastry brush, until mixture reaches 235° on a candy thermometer. Remove from heat and pour into the bowl of a standing mixer or another large bowl. Add butter and vanilla but do not stir; insert candy thermometer and let mixture stand undisturbed until cooled to 110°, 1 1/2 to 2 hours.
3. Line a 9-inch square pan with foil; lightly butter foil. With the paddle attachment of standing mixer or a sturdy wooden spoon, beat the chocolate mixture vigorously (on high speed if using mixer; reduce speed if motor starts to labor) until mixture thickens and loses its glossy sheen, about 5 minutes with a mixer, about 10 minutes by hand. Scrape into pan, smooth top, and chill until firm to the touch, at least 2 hours, or up to 1 day.
4. Lift foil to remove fudge from pan; cut fudge into 1-inch squares. Store cut fudge airtight in the refrigerator up to 1 week. To keep longer (up to 1 month), wrap uncut fudge airtight and chill; cut into squares as you want to use it. Serve at room temperature.

Candy basics: Before you begin, read the recipe all the way through and assemble all the tools and ingredients you will need. Many candy recipes require that you act quickly once the sugar syrup reaches the desired temperature. Use care when working with hot sugar syrup, as it can cause severe burns.
Choose the right pans. Heavy-bottomed stainless steel pans are best for cooking sugar mixtures. Thin, lightweight pans tend to conduct heat--and cook sugar syrup--unevenly.
Use a candy thermometer when called for. They measure temperatures up to 400°. You'll find them in the kitchen-gadget section of many supermarkets, priced between $10 and $20.
Submerge the bottom of the thermometer completely in the sugar syrup to get an accurate reading. Using a narrow pan with tall sides makes the mixture deeper, but, if necessary, you can gently tilt a shallower pan to submerge the thermometer bottom.
Melt chocolate gently for best results. If chocolate gets too hot, it may not set properly and will develop "bloom" (white streaks) on the surface when stored. Stirring chopped chocolate in a pan or bowl over hot, not simmering, water maintains an even, low temperature, resulting in glossy, firmly set chocolate.
Fudge pointers: Dissolve the sugar completely over low heat (step 1) before bringing the mixture to a simmer. Using superfine sugar, also sold as "baker's sugar," makes this easier (or just make your own by “pureeing” granulated sugar in your blender 1-2 cups at a time). To check whether the sugar has dissolved, scrape the pan bottom with a heatproof spatula, pull the spatula up, let the syrup on it cool for a few seconds, then rub a drop between your fingers. If you can feel grains of sugar, it hasn't dissolved yet.
Prevent sugar crystals from forming on the sides of the pan in step 2 by brushing down the sides with a wet pastry brush a few times.
Let the mixture cool to lukewarm (exactly 110°) before beating it (step 3); otherwise, the fudge may stiffen and become grainy. Pouring it into a large, shallow bowl helps it cool faster, but don't stir it too early. But don’t let it cool down too much either. We found that when it gets too cool it will be grainy too.
Beat the fudge well once it has cooled to 110°. Chocolate fudge thickens more than maple fudge at this stage, but both dull slightly and take on a lighter color after beating; that's when they're ready to pour into the pan. If the fudge becomes grainy, put the whole thing back into a clean pan and cook, while stirring, to 135 degrees again. Then cool as directed and beat as before. It works and doesn’t ruin the fudge.

Normally...... OK, so in trying to determine the fatal flaw, I'll go through the grisly details. I didn't use superfine sugar, and I'll usually make my own by "pureeing" 2 cups of granulated sugar at a time in my blender until it's powdery. (Don't use powdered sugar because it has corn starch in it to keep it from clumping up.) I also usually run my chocolate through the food processor so it is chopped fine and melts quickly. Instead, I waited until the sugar/cream/corn syrup mixture was all dissolved (I probably didn't do this slowly and carefully enough either) and then pounded the chocolate bar with a rolling pin to break it up. Then I wondered if the almonds were taking up too much volume in the bar and I'd actually be adding less chocolate. So I added a bit more than called for, and then when I was adding the unsweetened chocolate, a big chunk fell in that I didn't intend to add. So, too much chocolate? Not complete dissolving of the sugar? Nuts during cooking process acting like nucleation points for crystal formation? My next mistake was to try to rush the cooling process. I placed the bowl on the porch covered with a towel. It was breezy and in the high 50's. It did cool down faster, but when the thermometer said 110 degrees and I started to beat it, the bottom and sides were like concrete.

I really have rescued fudge that had sugared before by putting it back into the pot (butter and all) bringing it back up to soft ball stage (135 degrees) and re-cooling and beating. But, the following pictures show what happened this time.

So I carefully start warming it up. The butter melts first and separates out, but then as it continues to melt it comes back together in an emulsion. It was so thick that I thought I should moisten it with a little more cream. I had done this to a batch before - but then I added the cream when the seized fudge was cool.Adding cream to hot fudge instantly denatured the proteins in the cream and the water furiously boiled off leaving - yup- the fat. This tipped the emulsion balance and all the butter came sloshing back out and heated up so I could deep-fry the fudge in butter. Watch the video below.

It was totaly sad. My kids kept coming in the room, "Mmmm, smells good. When will it be done?" I gave up when I tested the temperature and it was up past hard ball and nearing hard crack stage. I knew it was done-for. So what do I do with a super heated pot of fat and chocolate cement? Not the disposal, and I didn't want it oozing out of the garbage bag into my can. The only place I knew was appropriate for it was out in my compost bin. Because after all, compost happens.